early thirties and other cliches

The worst thing about aging is everything that happens when you age...slowly (or rapidly) more and more I resemble the people I despised growing up, with their crinkled foreheads and thinning hair.  That is me now-I'm that fucking guy.  It all comes together rather quickly as you get older.  Before, older people were like different species barely resembling my own. I am the missing link, the transitional form from meaningless childhood to boring old age.  To make things even worse I've been cast out of religion's little mind matrix.  No solace in myth anymore just infinite unconscious lies ahead.  Its smothering to think about death but I won't have lungs to feel it or a mind to perceive it.  Infinite expansion competes against the infinitesimal contraction...something has to converge.  Multiplying infinity by zero is not unfamiliar to those trained in physics and math.  Picture a rectangle of width a and height 1/a as shown below in the shity diagram I uploaded.  The area A is simply the width W multiplied by the height H.

We simply substitute 1/a for H and a for W respectively, and let the algebra do the rest.  A = (a)*(1/a).  "The area is just one" says the hypothetical antagonist in my head.  Perhaps, but what happens when a approaches zero?   We can't divide by zero, nor can we really multiply by infinity because thats the realm of the undefined.  The best we can do is examine what happens when a gets very small.  We know the answer to that: a gets very small and (1/a) blows up.  The closer we get to zero the closer our simple formula for area becomes the anomalous expression A = infinity*zero.  As we approach death we approach zero conscious (whatever that means) and events after that expand out to infinity.  We can continue this overextended metaphor/analogy and say that its symmetrical with our birth.  In this light, humans are spikes of consciousness infinite in their reach but infinitesimal in duration.  

So what did all of that have to do with loosing your hair and getting old? If you didn't understand that is your fault not mine.  You must go back and reread until you understand it completely.